Where did it all go wrong?
Do you replay over and over in your head what went wrong? Or focus on what could possibly go wrong? Do you let fear and failure, or fear of failure, paralyze you?
Focusing on your small wins is a great way to keep fear in perspective and in bite-sized and manageable chunks. If you allow it, fear will grow into a three-headed monster and run your life.
I know you’ve had experiences of success – whether it’s in everyday smaller tasks that you barely even recognize or the larger, holy-cow, can you believe that just happened? variety.
Don’t worry about failures, worry about the chances you miss when you don’t even try. —Jack Canfield.
And yet the chances are you don’t build on these successes. Let’s take relationships as an (oh too easy) example – how often have you said, ‘I’ve been hurt before, I don’t want to be hurt again,’ and held back from entering fully and presently into a new relationship? There’s no doubting that relationships ending can feel crappy. But have you ever said, ‘I’ve had 20+ years of happy times in relationships compared to the relatively few bad months as they ended.’ The fear of being hurt again becomes our focus and stops us having what we most want.
In order to have a happy and fulfilled life that isn’t run from a place of fear, focus on the boosts rather than the stumbles. Focus on what you have done rather than what you fear you cannot do.
Manage the fear and do it anyway – here’s how bit.ly/11kZlg4
— Sarah Steele (@managingu) February 4, 2013
Take one small step and add one building block at a time. Sure, there’ll be setbacks – that’s life. If you are recognizing the falls (completely ignoring them is just denial) and focusing on the success you’ll bounce back more quickly. Trust your abilities – if you don’t believe in them how can you expect others to? And if they don’t believe in your abilities why would they hire you, buy your product or trust you as a leader?
If something goes wrong analyze it logically (not emotionally), see the lesson and then focus on doing it better next time. Do not let it stop you moving forward.
Allow yourself to take the small steps towards your goal and accept and trust yourself during both successful and difficult times.
Stepping up to stand in your own light and play amongst the ‘big kids’ is scary – and if you listen to your fear you will never try. Accept that sometimes life works the way we want and sometimes it doesn’t. You don’t have to be perfect – you just have to try your best and learn from your lessons.
Don’t miss out – get messy, make mistakes and ride the roller coaster even if scares the living crap out of you.
- What fear is holding you back right now? What are you afraid of?
- What success have you had that you can apply to this (regardless of how small)?
- What baby step can you take regardless of your fear?
- Be accountable – post below your small step and come back and tell us when you’ve done it.
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Blessings and Honey